I had the first of many miscarriages
soon after my husband and I moved into our town home, so we were thrilled when
I became pregnant again. This pregnancy was much easier than the first. I
didn’t get sick all the time, only gained 35 pounds, and I worked full-time
until just before the baby was born.
This baby was a scheduled repeat
c-section and was supposed to be take place at 8:00 AM on March 27th. But as I
lay in the hospital during my check-in exam, the baby’s heart rate dropped and
then disappeared. I was rushed into surgery to save the baby’s life and at 6:00
PM on March 26, 1985, Brandon Dale was born weighing in at 9 pounds and 8
ounces and 18 inches long.
Brandon was a sick baby from the
start and within ten days of birth, his weight was down to only five pounds. A
murmur was heard at his 10-day appointment and he was sent to Children’s Mercy
Hospital being admitted as a failure to thrive baby with some kind of heart
defect causing the murmur. After many tests and a three week hospital stay, we
found out he had a hole in his heart and a damaged mitral valve. The hole was only
the size of a dime and the doctor thought with medication, it would become
smaller and possibly heal itself. But instead, the hole grew larger, to the
size of a silver dollar, and the valve became more and more damaged. He was put
on medication to help with the heart damage, but I couldn’t take him home until
he was gaining weight on a consistent basis. We would celebrate when he gained
even an ounce and when he finally gained a couple of pounds we were able to
take him home again.
If this wasn’t enough by itself,
there would be more for him to endure. Brandon was born with the same birth
defect Vance had (their soft spots closed too soon) and after his heart was
stabilized, he underwent neurosurgery at 6 weeks of age to repair it. He proved
in this surgery what a strong willed child he would be. Just a few days later,
he was happy and eating and ready to go home. He even pulled out his IV just to
let the doctor know he was ready. I knew then he was a fighter. And what we
went through in the next 6 months, it’s a good thing he was.
Before Brandon’s heart could be
repaired, he had to weigh a minimum of 14 pounds. They sent us home with a
heart machine and he slept in our bedroom. Every night I would listen to the
machine and wait for the sirens to go off. And they did, several times, as he
would quit breathing or his heart rate would speed up to dangerous numbers.
Every time this happened, I would call the hospital and tell them we were on
the way. We became a regular on the 4th floor and the nurses teased us they
were going to put his name on the room permanently. Sometimes we would only
stay over night until they got him stabilized. But there were a few times we
stayed more than a week. I wanted to be home so bad, but I knew I had to do
what was best for my child.
Finally after a very harrowing seven
months, Brandon had open-heart surgery to repair the Ventricle Septal Defect
and damaged mitral valve that was trying to take away his very young existence.
I sat in the waiting room at the hospital for 7 hours waiting for his surgery
to be over. When he came out, his poor little body was covered in tubes and
bandages and an incision going from the top of his chest to his belly button.
He had a tube down his throat for
breathing and every time he woke up in ICU and saw me, he would try to cry and
scream out. After a couple of days of doing this, the doctor said to pull the
tube out and let him go to a regular hospital room. He was out of ICU three
days ahead of time and getting stronger and stronger every day. Four short days
later, we were given a clean bill of health and sent home. We would see the
doctor every 6 months for the first couple of years and he remarked many times
what a strong young boy Brandon was becoming.
Those were the scariest seven months
I’ve ever experienced in my life. Many times we thought we’d lose him, but he
hung in and was a real trooper through the whole thing. I think what he went
through in this surgery and what he still faced ahead of him is what has made
him the strong young man he is today.
There were complications with the
first neurosurgery he had and the left side of his skull caved in.
So we were
back in the hospital to have it corrected. They had to cut open his scull, take
out the pieces that had caved in and turn them over to give his head a somewhat
normal shape. When he came out of surgery this time, he was not the happy
little boy he had been the first time. His face was swollen, his eyes were both
bruised, and he ran a high fever for the first few days. We were in the hospital
for 10 days this time and I wondered if I had done the right thing. He didn’t
look the same and I wondered if he would ever come through it all. We thought
all had gone well, but during the surgery, a drill was placed to close to his
eardrum. They didn’t know for sure if there would be any long term damage from
this and because of his age, we wouldn’t know for another year or two.
Once again, as with Vance and his
disabilities, Sunshine Center Preschool was there to help him with physical and
occupational therapy. They were the ones to tell us Brandon was partially deaf
and helped us get him into programs for hearing aids and began speech therapy
so his verbal skills would not suffer. In the beginning we ate “shicken”
(chicken) for dinner and he went to “skewl” (school). But after several years
of intensive speech therapy and new and improved hearing aids, his speech has
become almost normal.
Brandon has grown into quite the
young man, earning a place on the Principal’s “A” Honor Roll his sophomore year
and graduating high school May 2003. He played soccer for several years,
managed the 9th Grade Football and Basketball teams, and had lots of good
friends along the way. He even went to a local music competition with a solo
during his 9th grade year. Brandon is now in college full time, working towards
his IT degree.
Brandon tells his peers that just
because life throws you a curve ball at times, that’s no reason to just sit
down and take it. Instead you learn from it and grow and find that living with
a handicap is okay. His life has never been easy, but I believe he will go far
in life because of the hardships he has come through with flying colors. I
don’t think I would be the person I am today if it hadn’t been for Brandon.
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